If we haven't used an aspect of our creativity in a long time, we can fear it may have abandoned us. Or atrophied. We might imagine that it feels angry or resentful at being neglected for so long. We might fear it is lost forever.
In my experience your creativity never leaves you. If you haven't seen it in a while, it's probably just hibernating. Curled up in a cozy cave waiting for the season to change. For the conditions to ripen so it can venture out and get back to foraging and frolicking.
Flaming June by Frederic Leighton
In preparation for designing a 1:1 creativity retreat I led this week, I looked back on the notebooks from different creativity workshops I've taken to see if I wanted to adapt/"steal" any exercises. In the process, I stumbled across something I wrote as part of a poetry workshop a few years ago and it still resonates powerfully for me, so I thought I'd share it:
Here we have a poetess awakening from hibernation.
Like a fairytale princess cursed into a deep decades-long slumber.
No harm came to her. She grew only more beautiful, more fully into form.
Do not grieve.
For what you may not know is she was dreaming the whole time.
Her imagination kept her company.
Like a grandmother spider spinning the most intricate tapestries of light.
Webs of stories sparkling and singing.
So this sleeping beauty has not wasted away, not withered.
Rather, she rested in perfect patience, knowing her sleep is temporary.
It's end draws near.
In this sleep-induced silence, her voice grew down into the dark of the body.
The roots of her voice grew below the line of sight.
So all the preparations have been laid.
As deep as the root system is spread in the ground, so high and wide and broad the branches will stretch to the sky.
The roots are ready to rise.
I did not write it in poem format. It was a stream of consciousness exercise across a few journal pages. But writing it here, it feels like it wants to take the shape of a poem.
It was in that poetry workshop, with the gorgeous and gifted Sukina Pilgrim, that I wrote my first poem in 20 years. Two decades of my life. A poem I wrote when I was 15 was badly received and I subconsciously scratched poetry off the menu of options for creative outlets. It was only at 35, in the pandemic, that I saw someone on instagram recommend this workshop and I got that tingle of intuition I've learned to follow.
I don't write poetry regularly. But it's back on the menu of options. It's out of hibernation.
I've been riding waves of intense emotions about the horrors happening in Palestine and in the middle of the night a few weeks ago my thoughts condensed into a poem. I wrote it down. I shared it. I felt very seen. One person left a comment that hurt. But I handled my emotions and responded from my wise self. It felt really really good to speak my truth and to have poetry as a means to do so.
Is there an aspect of your creativity you've lost touch with? What's one thing you could do to create the conditions to help it gently awaken from hibernation?